I understand the basic idea of why all these terrible things were allowed to happen to Job. I enjoyed that part of the story! I admired how Job stood firm despite the devil's attacks.
But I only really enjoy it, when it's in the story of Job.
What I mean is, when things similar to what happened to Job happen to people I know... I get confused. I get angry. I feel pity... even guilty.
When troubles and hardships happen to me... I get just plain stressed. Furious. I isolate myself. Those are the times I begin to doubt God's love.
When I hear peoples' testimonies and they talk about a time where they didn't feel like God loved them, I think to myself, "Pish, posh! I know that God always loves me. He will never leave me, nor forsake me." Yet, looking back, every time the littlest thing goes wrong for me, or when things get busy or stressful, my mind starts telling me "God's not with you." "God doesn't love you." "God's purposely making things hard for you."
Why am I so fickle? So naive? I so often act like a typical old-testament Israelite, or a stagnant Christian. When things go well, I'm at the top of the roller-coaster. "Yay, God! You are my number one! I will never stop praising you! I will never stop trusting you!" Then, when things turn slightly off the tracks, things go wacky. "God, how could you do this to me? Don't you love me? Don't you want what's best for me? After everything I try to do for you, why would you let this happen?"
Not too long ago, I attended a small little bible-study/get-together. It was lovely. We had tea, sang some songs, and just talked. The lady leading the little devotional talked about something that really impacted me. I won't mention her name, simply because I don't know if she would like that. She talked about this exact subject, and helped me see from a whole new perspective.
We've all heard the song, Blessed Be Your Name.
You give and take away,
You give and take away.
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be your name!
So, I don't know if it's just me, but for the most part, I didn't have a problem with that. It didn't bother me (at least, when things were going well, it didn't). My thinking was somewhere along the lines of, "If God is God, then it's up to Him who gets lots and who gets little. It's not my place to determine. If God sees a need to take something precious to us away, then I just have to trust."
Now, I don't think that's a bad viewpoint. In some ways, I think it's true. I didn't understand why He would take things away, and for the most part, I DIDN'T REALLY CARE. I kind of just assumed that His plan was best and everything would work out in the end... but I felt that way more when I watched other people suffer. I held that point of view a lot less when I was the one losing something, as you can imagine.
This way of thinking about Spiritual matters isn't a great tactic. As Christians who want to know, pursue, and serve Christ with their lives, we should be satisfied with where we are. We need to be moving forward, not getting comfortable with where we are now.
This lady talked about her own story relating to this topic. She told us about how at one point in her life, she felt so utterly exhausted. It felt like God was just taking thing after thing away from her, and she felt like there was nothing left. She felt totally spent, useless, and depressed.
But she came to a point of understanding. A point of understanding that I am so thankful that she shared- it really impacted me. Taking away these things she thought were important wasn't God's way of punishment. It wasn't God's way of showing indifference. Rather, it was proof- proof of His love.
Woah, woah, woah- what? Yup, you read that correctly. I think when I felt like things were falling apart around me, I viewed it all as just life. I almost didn't find any connection to God. I felt as if He wasn't involved in my life. That if he was involved, life wouldn't be treating me this way.
Nuh-uh. That's not how it is. The way this girl explained it made so much more sense.
Remember that post I wrote a while back about hope? How our hope should not be in the things of this world, but in Christ alone? Well, I believe we see a connection here.
We get way too attached to the things of this world. Our jobs, our friends, our possessions, our family, our reputations... I could go on. Christ sees our heart's motive: to take up our cross daily and follow Christ to the bitter ends. But he also sees our mind, which confuses our heart, sometimes. It says: I will take up my cross only when it is convenient for me to do so, only when it means I don't have to sacrifice anything I love, and only when I feel like it.
That doesn't sound right to me. I thought Christ was Lord of the lives of Christians, but the above statement doesn't sound very... 'servant-ly.'
God knows our impressionable minds' motives, and He knows our hearts' as well. I really believe that when things seem to be falling apart around us, that's actually God, pulling things away for a bit to show us that He is all we need.
It is SOOOO easy to get distracted with the things around us that we think we need. Well, news-flash! God actually knows what we need. And all we need is... HIM!
We cling so tightly to the things of this world. I can imagine the scene: me, clinging on to my dancing life. I cling so tightly to it, it becomes my only passion; my most important goal. God is whispering to me, "you don't need that. I am all you need. Let me show you that I'm all you need." Maybe I get an injury, preventing me from dancing for a bit. Maybe it seems like my life is falling apart. And, maybe it is. But if that life is collapsing because of a bump in the road concerning dance.... then my life is being built around the wrong thing. This is God's way of telling me that.
This lady said how once she got to a place where she felt like everything was gone and there was nothing left, that was when she felt God the most strongly. That was when God started to rebuild a real life for her. A life centered around who it should be centered around. Not herself, not her hobbies, not her friends, not her occupations. It was a better, more fulfilling life being put into place. A life focused on God.
When God comes first, the things He wants to institute in your life will follow.
Maybe when it feels like everything's falling apart, it's a sign that I'm not centering my life around the One who gave me it. God. Things are destined to fall apart when our hope is placed on them. God is the only truly trustworthy and stable figure we will ever have. When we find our total sustenance and identity in Christ alone, that's where hope is found!
So truly, He gives and He takes away. He gives us Himself, the Living Water. He takes away the things that distract us from what really matters. He teaches us to count on Him for what we need and not rely on our own understanding of the situation.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
