Through the Night

The description of "Survival of the Fittest" does not include heartache. Tears and comfort are not part of the process of evolving. I've experienced both within the last 24 hours. My beloved dog passed away. 

I found myself fighting back tears and trying to swallow a boulder in my throat every time I had looked at his injured, sick body last night. Explain that, science. Why was it so hard to talk to him and say 'Good-bye,' just moments before they put him to sleep for the last time? Why could I hardly say the words, hardly look at him without my vision blurring? 

Because we were made to love. We were made in the image of Love.

The only explanation for love and hatred, heartache and joy, peace and worry, excitement and boredom, desire and contentment... is that we were formed in the likeness of a God who created emotions. He created the human brain to intricately respond to events in our lives. Not systematically, like a robot, but each in our own different way. How we handle grief, the way we show our love to others, the things that bring us joy, the colours we like, the way we laugh... we were designed to care.

We were knit together with a soul. A mind. A spirit. A heart. The things that touch us are different for every person. Those who are moved by music, by touch, by dance, by artwork, by nature... it's all in the gorgeous personalities that God has created perfectly with so much care. He meant for us to have emotions. He put it in our hearts. He made us to reflect His love for us. He saw that love reflected when my family sobbed our last good-bye's to our little puppy. He saw His love for us returned to Him when we comforted each other afterward. He saw His love shared with all the friends who comforted and shared their condolences with us. The people who called, the people who prayed, the people who shared in our sorrow.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 ~

There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under the heavens: 

a time to be born and a time to die, 

a time to plant and a time to uproot, 

a time to kill and a time to heal, 

a time to tear down and a time to build, 

a time to weep and a time to laugh, 

a time to mourn and a time to dance, 

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, 

a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 

a time to search and a time to give up, 

a time to keep and a time to throw away, 

a time to tear and a time to mend, 

a time to be silent and a time to speak, 

a time to love and a time to hate, 

a time for war and a time for peace.

I am sure you've heard or read that passage dozens of times before... but why don't you go back and actually read every individual line? I did, and I could see memories that fit perfectly with each one. There is a time for everything. Have you ever read the words that come after?

Verse 11~

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Everything. Crying is beautiful, because it is in those moments of heartbreak and sorrow that God can come in so clearly, and hug so tightly.

It hurts right now, and I don't know how long it will hurt for. But I know that this was the prime time to weep and to laugh, to mourn and to dance. God gave me my puppy for laughter and joy, and He knew that when the time came, it would be the time to cry... and the time to be comforted. Tears are just the proof of His handiwork. His fearfully and wonderfully made creation- people who feel.

This affection that he casts on us is meant to be turned into affection towards others. He is comforting me so that I can comfort others, when they are in sorrow. It hurts. It hurts worse than anything. But God is in control. 

Psalm 30:5~

Sobbing can remain through the night.

But joy comes in the morning.

The Bare Necessities

Growing up is a scramble. It's filled with stress upon worry upon responsibility. Parents rush to put kids through school, music lessons, an assortment of sports, swimming lessons- all the necessary basics. They work hard to help their kids achieve the highest grades possible, be polite and kind to others, eat healthy, and work hard. 

Now, with just two years left of high school, the scramble for money and for jobs has begun. I know that we all sometimes stay awake late at night, tossing and turning with the fear that we will not make it in the big wide world beyond our home. This is the time when teenagers start realizing that after high school comes either college, university, and well-paying jobs... or living in a basement redoing failed courses and searching for any job available.

It's called the future, and it scares most people away from the mere thought. How will we survive? We all want a fantastic, enjoyable career, a nice new house in a peaceful neighborhood, and beautiful, handsome spouse. 

These worries have been hitting me hard lately, as I've been stressing over schoolwork, earning money, and figuring out what to do with my summer this year. I've had so many opportunities presented to me, and it's like a barrage of choices. My first thoughts were, "How can I make money?" But I was a little bit disappointed in myself for automatically making cash my first priority. I went through the list. Opportunities for missions trips.... helping with VBS.... street ministry.... summer camp.... what am I supposed to choose? 

Even though I wanted to focus on something that God would be pleased with, I still found myself looking through the list for which one would benefit me the most. I skimmed over the volunteer jobs, and only looked seriously at the ones that would pay. I want to be prepared for when high school is over, I don't want to be at all in need of funds.

....but I won't be needing anything.

Luke 22:35~

Then Jesus asked them, 

"When I sent you without purse, bag 

or sandals, did you lack anything?" 

"Nothing," they answered. 

Philippians 4:19~

And this same God who takes care of me will 

supply all your needs from his glorious riches, 

which have been given to us 

in Christ Jesus.

Why am I afraid of what will come next? How many blogs have I written about the secure, sovereign hand of God, which will accomplish its work no matter what? I believe that God has a purpose for my life. Whether it is through writing, teaching, dancing, speaking, cleaning, anything... He made me to accomplish something, and he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6)

It is God, and God alone that has the power to give or take a life. He will protect me. He will guide me. He will show me where to go as long as I am listening to His instructions. Why should I fear man? If my God is for me, then who could ever stop me? 

People cannot harm me if I have the Lord on my side, and am sacrificing my life to further His kingdom. This is what He means when He tells us to pick up our crosses daily. Last I heard, carrying a cross was not a well-paying job, money-wise. However, the things we give up and the risks we take to glorify Christ's name are being stored in heaven as crowns, too glorious to be compared to the pain we endure on earth. 

So be bold! The future is full of surprises, but the more we look in His Word to find our purpose, the more we pour out our hearts and let them break with compassion, the more abundant our lives will be! Fear not!

James 4:13-15~

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, 

spend a year there, carry on business and make money."Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that."

Christ has conquered death, and we belong to Christ. So... can you even name one legitimate fear? The future belongs to God. The risks you take when following His voice, He will be there guarding you, protecting you, providing for you. Money is no object... in fact, it's not even necessary.